Tuesday, February 9, 2010

A Flawed Hero

"Ms. Grace, I love you and I'm so glad that you are my teacher!" The cutest words from the cutest little girl. A little girl who was distant in the beginning and sometimes difficult to work with. Imagine my heart when I heard those words come out of her mouth.

It was short lived. She followed that cute little innocuous phrase with, "Ms. Grace I want to be just like you! I love your hair! I tried to part my hair just like yours, but it didn't work. I wish my hair was just like yours. Ms. Grace..." And so it has continued for the past few weeks. Rather than spend her break time with the other children in the gym, she'd rather hang out with me, waxing poetic about my "perfections".

Now, I am a little used to this phenomenom of hero worship since my only sister is nine years younger. It was always terrifying knowing that anything I said or did would have a magnified impact on her impressionable mind. However, possibily messing up your little sister is nothing compared to having that sort of sway with a stranger's daughter. My sister sees my mistakes on a daily basis and I know that she will forgive me and learn someday that I am not perfect. This young girl will have very little contact with me, so I must be sure to live above reproach in her eyes. She is of that tender age where she is just starting to reach beyond her parents for role models. What's worse, she is especially taken with my appearance and style, the last things a second grader need worry about.

What message do I send if I wear that almost-too-low-cut shirt to church? What does she think of her hero when I lose my temper with the choir or brush her off when I'm busy? Does she ever see me at church with a bad attitude during worship or talking during the service? If I were to continue talking with her about style and encourage her to try to be pretty, will that continue to be the misguided focus of her young years?

"Oh but honey, you're hair is so beautiful! Much prettier than mine. You should part it so it looks good on you, not me. I don't think you need to change anything. You are much prettier than me just as you are." Hopefully those words averted this crisis, but I will have to be wise in my dealings from now on. I have sixty-five little eyes on me that see more than I had expected. I pray that I can be half the hero they expect.

On a lighter note, at least I have one child in my choir that thinks everything I say is divine. Something possessed me to explain to her and her little sister why little sis shouldn't be spinning around the gym when she had an ear infection and why that made her abnormally sick. I am no expert on the inner ear and I was dillusional to expect a second grader and kindergartener to understand the complicated workings of the body. Yet, she made her sister stand still during my five minute lecture and afterwards told me in her most serious voice, "Thank you Ms. Grace for telling us that. You are right. That makes sense. I will make sure my sister doesn't spin anymore." and walked away on her best behavior. If only the other sixty-four kids believed I was always right and to be revered! :)

1 comment:

  1. wait until she starts doing and saying what you do. Lately my "friends" have been adopting my phrases. Imagine third graders saying things like "that is so not what I meant" or "figuratively, not literally."

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